Der -Was mich heute glücklich gemacht hat- Thread

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    • Zagdil schrieb:

      galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html
      The Egg
      By: Andy Weir
      Spoiler anzeigen

      You were on your way home when you died.
      It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.
      And that’s when you met me.
      “What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”
      “You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.
      “There was a… a truck and it was skidding…”
      “Yup,” I said.
      “I… I died?”
      “Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies,” I said.
      You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”
      “More or less,” I said.
      “Are you god?” You asked.
      “Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”
      “My kids… my wife,” you said.
      “What about them?”
      “Will they be all right?”
      “That’s what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”
      You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.
      “Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”
      “Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”
      “Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”
      “Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right,”
      “All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”
      You followed along as we strode through the void. “Where are we going?”
      “Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”
      “So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”
      “Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”
      I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.
      “You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”
      “How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”
      “Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”
      “Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”
      “Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”
      “Where you come from?” You said.
      “Oh sure,” I explained “I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”
      “Oh,” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”
      “Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”
      “So what’s the point of it all?”
      “Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”
      “Well it’s a reasonable question,” you persisted.
      I looked you in the eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”
      “You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”
      “No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”
      “Just me? What about everyone else?”
      “There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you and me.”
      You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”
      “All you. Different incarnations of you.”
      “Wait. I’m everyone!?”
      “Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.
      “I’m every human being who ever lived?”
      “Or who will ever live, yes.”
      “I’m Abraham Lincoln?”
      “And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too,” I added.
      “I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.
      “And you’re the millions he killed.”
      “I’m Jesus?”
      “And you’re everyone who followed him.”
      You fell silent.
      “Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”
      You thought for a long time.
      “Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”
      “Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”
      “Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”
      “No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”
      “So the whole universe,” you said, “it’s just…”
      “An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”
      And I sent you on your way.

      Hat mich abgeholt.
    • Zagdil schrieb:

      galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html
      The Egg
      By: Andy Weir
      Spoiler anzeigen

      You were on your way home when you died.
      It was a car accident. Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.
      And that’s when you met me.
      “What… what happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”
      “You died,” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.
      “There was a… a truck and it was skidding…”
      “Yup,” I said.
      “I… I died?”
      “Yup. But don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies,” I said.
      You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”
      “More or less,” I said.
      “Are you god?” You asked.
      “Yup,” I replied. “I’m God.”
      “My kids… my wife,” you said.
      “What about them?”
      “Will they be all right?”
      “That’s what I like to see,” I said. “You just died and your main concern is for your family. That’s good stuff right there.”
      You looked at me with fascination. To you, I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man. Or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.
      “Don’t worry,” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”
      “Oh,” you said. “So what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”
      “Neither,” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”
      “Ah,” you said. “So the Hindus were right,”
      “All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “Walk with me.”
      You followed along as we strode through the void. “Where are we going?”
      “Nowhere in particular,” I said. “It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”
      “So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”
      “Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”
      I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders. “Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.
      “You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”
      “How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”
      “Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”
      “Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”
      “Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe. Things are different where I come from.”
      “Where you come from?” You said.
      “Oh sure,” I explained “I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”
      “Oh,” you said, a little let down. “But wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”
      “Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”
      “So what’s the point of it all?”
      “Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You’re asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”
      “Well it’s a reasonable question,” you persisted.
      I looked you in the eye. “The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature.”
      “You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”
      “No, just you. I made this whole universe for you. With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”
      “Just me? What about everyone else?”
      “There is no one else,” I said. “In this universe, there’s just you and me.”
      You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on earth…”
      “All you. Different incarnations of you.”
      “Wait. I’m everyone!?”
      “Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.
      “I’m every human being who ever lived?”
      “Or who will ever live, yes.”
      “I’m Abraham Lincoln?”
      “And you’re John Wilkes Booth, too,” I added.
      “I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.
      “And you’re the millions he killed.”
      “I’m Jesus?”
      “And you’re everyone who followed him.”
      You fell silent.
      “Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “you were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you.”
      You thought for a long time.
      “Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”
      “Because someday, you will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”
      “Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”
      “No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”
      “So the whole universe,” you said, “it’s just…”
      “An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”
      And I sent you on your way.


      find ganz geili, hab das vor nen paar monaten darüber entdeckt
    • lubold schrieb:

      roterbaron schrieb:

      Hab in meinem jugendlichen Leichtsinn also Mittelschicht oder leicht gehobene Mittelschicht erwartet. Nicht sicher, was ich da bekommen hab
      was genau hat das mit dem rest des posts zu tun? gehören die jetzt nicht zur mittelschift, weil sie blöde meinungen haben?
      Bildung korreliert mit Intelligenz. Und ich hab quasi etwas überdurchschnittlich intelligente Menschen erwartet. Ich dachte, dass die Häufigkeit von dummen Aussagen mit dem Bildungsgrad abnehmen. Scheint aber kein thing zu sein. Daher hab ich mich selbst als "unerfahren=jugendlicher Leichtsinn" beschrieben.
      Die gehören obv. "trotzdem" zur Mittelschicht (definiere ich eigentlich nur übers Einkommen) haben nur mein Bild selbiger gerade gerückt. Dachte halt das die Idiotendichte da abnimmt, aber da keiner weiter widersprochen hat, scheint das wohl in deren Augen ok gewesen zu sein. (Leute die diese Aussagen tätigen und gutheißen würd ich mindestens als Idioten bezeichnen)
      Hab also was gelernt daher auch im Glücklichmachfred
    • Kennt ihr das, wenn ihr so Mails schreibt, aber entweder keine Antwort bekommt oder doofe oder nicht wisst, ob ihr das richtig macht?

      Ich habe einen Kunden in England, der heißt Daniel.
      Und dieser Antwort auf jede (informative) Mail mit einem kurzen, netten Dankeschön.

      Ich freue mich jedes Mal, dem zu schreiben, weil ich dann wieder eine Antwort bekomme :)




      HumanlyPuma schrieb:

      junge leg dir ne hantel ins büro oder geh kegeln
    • pn wenn du noch leute brauchst fürs beinebrecherkommando



      eventually there comes a point where it's like the true test for your team - will he cast a spell or will he not
      - Artour Babaev

      Und wenn beide dann nicht mehr stacken und der einer 6k Boi, der vorher 4k war, mit einem anderen 4k Boi spielt, dann ist er nicht mehr 6k, weil er reverse trägert, oder?
      - User des Monats
    • Vier Punkte zum Glücklichsein:

      1) Habe endlich messbare Kristalle von der Huso-Verbindung züchten können, so dass Paper#2 Save Ende September submitted werden kann :thumbsup:
      2) Mein neues Feldbett ist heute gerade noch rechtzeitig angekommen um:

      3) Morgen einen meiner besten Spezl :friends: aus der alten Heimat in seiner Bude in Roth zu besuchen und mit den anderen "Profis" dessen Geburtstag nachzufeiern. Zwei Tage lang ab ins Saufi :beer:

      4) Habe ich jetzt in der Bude soweit klar Schiff gemacht und alles gepackt, so dass ich mich morgen früh um nix mehr kümmern muss außer Vorfreude und einen kurzen Arbeitstag :teacher:
      Hier sollte irgendwas mit Bierpong stehen :grinking:
    • Meine Schabe hat so einen kleinen Zwergpinscher. Der reinste Pussymagnet. Nur schade, dass ich das Ganze nicht nutzen kann.
      Hater prallen ab an der Karbonschicht wie der Regen.
      Mann, ich setz mich auf den Thron und geb ein Fick dabei auf Jeden.
      Und roll weiter auf Chrom bis sie dann nicht mehr mit mir reden.
      Keine Bitch und kein Stress zieht mich runter wie ein Dämon,
      Ich blend sie alle weg mit ultraviolettem Xenon.
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